A Passion for Running

Last night I was thinking about the sprint duel Corinne and I had the other day and had a realization about how aging has affected my spirit. What I realized is that the years have made me nervous and tentative about pushing myself – really letting go?while running. Let me explain.

Like many people, as a teenager I was extremely active. I was constantly running, biking or playing intense sports. When I think about that time of my life and compare it to today, I am struck by the complete lack of concern I?used to?have for?becoming injured. Back then, I would literally roll out of bed and?sprint down our 200 meter long driveway to meet the yellow school bus I rode to school (I was a farm boy). Another example of this is?growing up we had a five-foot high fence with a gate at the end of our sidewalk. I never opened that gate. Never. I always jumped over it.

Power and quickness without?hesitation. That was the way I was.?The?sport?I really excelled at was basketball. Without so much as a thought I would burst into full out sprints,?dart sideways, leap into a 40 inch vertical jump and then burst back into sprinting. I used to do that kinda thing a hundred times a day and never became injured. What’s more, I never ever worried about becoming injured. In fact, I was completely carefree and joyful doing it. It was natural.

So here I am 20 years older noting differences between then and now. On one hand, I’m very pleased because I’m definitely in the best cardiovascular shape of my life. The furthest I ran in high school was 800 meters and it damn near killed me.?On the other hand,?I’ve lost?a lot of?the quickness, springiness and flexibility I used to have. I’m not happy about this but I can live with?it. However…

…What really bugs me is?the loss?of?carefree spontaneity. When Corinne and I had our race, it took me a few seconds to give chase. While making that decision, and as I fought to quicken my pace I thought, “I hope my back holds out. I hope I don’t twist an ankle. I hope I don’t tear a muscle”. What’s worse is these thoughts are with me much?of the time.

Grrrrr.

So, I’m aware of?this?burden. The burden of knowing I?could?get hurt?doing what I love?- especially?when I push?hard?- a big part of the fun for me.?This burden?often holds?me back?from just letting loose and?”going for it”. I don’t like that.

Grrrrr.

I want to fight this mental part of aging. Why? Because I believe it is one of the keys to staying young. I think you have to?want to be young to stay young and part of “wanting it” is fighting?the tendency to slow down physically. The only way I know how to?fight this tendency?is to continue pushing the limits of my body. My goal is to regain some of that lost power, quickness, springiness, flexibility, spontaneity and joy. It’s a true balancing act?though because (here it comes again) I…worry.

Grrrrr.

There are inspiring stories out there. Stories of 90 year-old marathoners. Stories of 70 year-old three-hour marathoners. These are stories about people who challenge our notions of aging. I hope one day someone writes a story about me when I’m 70 or 80 or 90 or 100 and some young 37 year-old gets inspired enough to get off his ass and start defying the “laws” of aging. I hope that 37 year-old is my kid.

Yeah, it sucks to get old so I’m not gonna do it.

How about you?