Running Commentary

Diagnosis February 21 2006

My older sister had a baby about 2.5 years ago.
She has thought there was something ‘not right’ with this guy for at least 18 months (off and on cause who really wants to believe theres something wrong with your child). Feffie and I had suspected something was up for quite a while but pretty much kept it to ourselves.
Our sistah went to see her family Doc about year ago and mentioned that she thought 10 tantrums a day, some lasting an hour wasn’t normal. The fact that she can’t wear a different hat on her head without him freaking right the fuck out is not normal. She cannot open the curtains in a room he already in. It totally freaks him out. The woman told her (A DOCTOR PEOPLE) that she needs to set better LIMITS for the child and then when sistah complained she was nearing the end of her rope with this child (no one else can care for him…ever) she prescribed her with anti-depressants.
Fast forward to today. Sistah is at her wits end. She cannot get this kids diaper changed on most days. He cannot play with Noah becaus he often becomes too physical for him and hurts him with like ohhh brooms to the head and stuff. He hates to be touched. You can’t cuddle or snuggle with this boy, yet he has refused to sleep alone since the DAY he was born. My sistah was at a parenting seminar about how to deal with the terrible twos. They sent her home with homework. Everyone was to document the causes surrounding that weeks tantrums. She was rattled when she realized they had left her enough space for only 3 tantrums. TOTAL. She called and said…umm I think there’s something different going on here. My guy has WAY more than 3 tantrums a week. He has 3 before lunch most days. I agreed (Noah has MAYBE one tantrum a week…but not even that many some weeks). So she approached the instructors, one of which happened to be a behavioural specialist and told them that she wanted to meet with them. They immediately were VERY supportive and set the meeting up for as soon as possible. The same day she happened to make an appointment with her family doc for the same day. Today.
The first appointment was with the behaviour people. They called her early in the morning and asked if they could make it earlier cause they had picked up 2 extra people (from that feild) that would also like to sit in and offer their 2 cents. Sistah could not make it earlier with the little guy because he was STILL in his jammies and was refusing (screaming..kicking…punching biting) to get his bum changed. They could hear all this and said “girl! You need help…leave him with your daughter (20) and come alone so we can talk” And she did.
They went threw a serious of behaviour questions…odd ones …but anyway…at the end of the questions they tallied everything up and told sistah that a normal toddler WITH behaviour issues (big ones) would usually score around a 50. Her little guy scored 150.
So they talked and talked and talked and sistah CRIED for help. They set her up with someone to come and help her in her home a couple of days a week. They gave her the name of the pediatrician that specializes in children with @utism. They were fabulous and supportive. She left there feeling like she had really started the ball rolling. All she needed was for her family doc to refer her on to the pediatrician.
Enter family doctor.
She snickered when sistah started off by telling that they were STILL not sleeping through the night. She suggested that sistah lay with him and HOLD ON TO HIM TIGHTLY in order to help him go to sleep quicker (usually takes at least 2 hrs to get him to sleep each night), and also to leave him alone when he has his tantrums as this will help to calm him quicker. THEN she mentioned that sistah was “half a year too late” in coming to her with these problems. Whatever that means.
Finally, FINALLY after MUCH yelling and sistah flat out telling her that “no we do not need a check up from you, we need THIS referal from you..please and thank you” did she finally relent and offer the referral. Not, or course, before she argured that she could get her in quicker with a different pediatrician. Eventually they compromised and she left with two referrals…one for her choice and one for her Dr’s choice.
Anyway, at least now he (and she!) will be getting the help that they need. He needs help. She needs help. They cannot continue like this, and now they won’t have too.
Sad though eh? I mean we’re all pushing for a diagnosis and treatment for the little guy…but DUDE I think my nephew is @utistic.