What was I thinking?
Family Day improved as a the day went on … we didn’t end up skating but we did go out for dinner before Derek’s soccer game, and all three kids were well-behaved in the restaurant. (Imagine parents doing happy dance.)
Recent replies by Heather and Marie have got me thinking … well, what was I thinking??? I thought if I was going to run 5k this summer, I had better be able to RUN 5k. Top form, running the whole way, no stopping, no break, no walks. Now, I’m questioning that: why don’t I TRY a race, and if I have to walk some, that’s OK?? And moreso, why did that option never, ever occur to me???
This is a big frying-pan-on-the-head moment for me.
I do that a TON in my life. If I can’t do things very well, or almost know that I can accomplish them, I don’t think I do them very much. Pretty safe shell to live in. If someone told me that statement about myself, I’d disagree: I live on the edge … heck, I’ve skydived … I’m adventurous …. HAH! I think I stay in the safe zone a lot, especially when it comes to my fitness. I don’t always like to be uncomfortable. Maybe this is why I hate working my abs so much?? I’m sure there are deeper and darker reasons that I could pay a therapist hundreds of dollars per hour to talk about, but that really doesn’t matter now that I’ve actually NAMED this problem. I like to stay safe.
I need to stretch myself. I need to sign up to do something that I’m not 100% sure I can do well …
For me, that’s a race. I don’t call myself a runner. Actually, my family (as in parents, brother’s, in-laws, etc.) don’t even know I’ve been running. I don’t think I’m “supposed” to be a runner. I don’t think I look like a runner …. yet. I still have weight to lose, muscles to tone, speed to gain. I was never a runner in high school who just took a break when I had kids. I always chose javelin at the track meet … hmmm … because I could do it! This is really my first kick at the can with running.
I don’t know how this reads … it may sound trivial to someone with a lot of running / race experience, but for me it’s pretty emotional, and quite pivotal.
Looking for a race, people. Well, first, I’m going out to run. As soon as the Glue-Stick Monster wakes up from her nap. 
