Time for my nap!
I spent last night at the Hospital. Although, it wasn’t a typical hospital stay.
I was at their sleep clinic to be tested for sleep apnea. You know sleep apnea. Its where your airway becomes blocked while you sleep and you can’t breathe and then you wake up 100 times at night to start breathing again. It disrupts your sleep and makes you tired all the time.
So here’s what happened. I checked in and they brought me to my room which looked more like a small hotel room than a hospital room, except for the camera above the TV pointing at the bed. I had to change into my “pajamas”, which are just shorts and a T-shirt. I was going to make a joke about always sleeping naked but they’ve probaby heard it 10,000 times and are sick of trying to prentend its funny and original.
In the middle of the room is a chair sitting on a white sheet that’s been laid out on the floor. The nurse tells me to sit in the chair while she does the electrodes. Did you know they put electrodes on you? They monitor you breathing, heart rate, oxygen levels, arm and leg movement, eye movement, chin movement, and brainwave activity.
I counted 14 electrodes plus two on each arm and eachs leg, one on my upper lip, one on my chin, one on my left index finger, and two straps around my torso. But what was odd is she put on the ones on my leg and then went to the other end of the room and sat down and asked me questions. So, I’m sitting in the middle of the room, on a chair, on a sheet being questioned while electrodes are hooked to my body. I felt like if I answered wrong I was going to get shocked!
She glued the electrodes to my skull. I’m not sure how many were on my skull, but I think at least 8. The glue uses diethyl ether as the solvent so it has this funky fruity smell, if you’ve ever smelled ether before. She told me I could eat or drink whatever I wanted while I was there except for coffeee, soda, and chocolate. No problem. :)
Then I have to wait until everyone is ready for bed, so I watch TV (eek!) for about an hour. Then they hooked the electrode harness to the main jack coming out of the wall. It kinda looked like a printer cable. Did you ever see The Matrix? That’s what it felt like. Kinda of a mix between that and Altered States.
After she does some calibration with my eye movements, breathing, and jaw clenching she says to try and relax and fall asleep. Yeah, right. Wired up like the inside of a telephone junction box. There’s TV’s blaring in all the other rooms because nobody else is going to bed yet. Loud talking and smashing in the hallways. I think it took me 30 minutes to fall asleep.
I woke up about 5 am with a really sore back. So I sat up on the side of the bed. “Jon, where are you going?” “God? Is that you?” They watch you constantly, so if you go to use the bathroom, they need to disconnect you so you don’t rip the electrodes off.
I couldn’t get back to sleep so around 6 am, the nurse came in and ended that part of the test. She took off all but the 14 elecctrodes, and said part two would begin in a little while.
After breakfast, another nurse came in to start part two, which involves monitoring me falling asleep for 4 naps during the day. So at 8am, 10am, Noon, and 2pm, I took 4, 20 minute naps and they watched my brain and other stuff while I did that. If you fall asleep, they let you sleep for 15 minutes. I usually fell asleep almost at the end of the 20 minutes. I kept dozing off and then I’d get startled awake again.
I spent alot of time watching TV in between naps. The good news was that Charmed was on, and is there anything more lovely than Alyssa Milano running around chasing evil demons? I think not
I could go anywhere I wanted to between naps, but it was rainy out and I thought the people at the store would freak out if I walked in with electrodes glued to my head. “Excuse me, do you sell portable generators?”
At the end of the day they had to scrub the glue off my skull with acetone. Lovely. Then I could shower off the other glue. The glue from the electrodes on my face was water soluble.
She gave me a printout of my brainwaves and stuff when I was sleeping. Proof that I have both a brain and a heart. The Tin Woodsman and the Scarecrow got nothin’ on me. Here’s my brain in REM sleep.
The lines labeled ROC ROCA1 are my eyes moving. I think the 4 lines above that are from my brain. Atleast they said it was from my brain.
The nurse said I might have very mild apnea, if I had it at all, but the doc would do a full analysis and let me know.
So that was my fun day. What have you been doing?
P.S.
4 more days!
April 12th, 2006 18:46
I almost got tested in the same manner for insomnia and I always wondered how people would ever fall asleep with that much stuff hooked up to them. I can’t even fall asleep unless I’m in the perfecct position, in complete darkness, with just the right amount of covers and perfect temperature and sound conditions.
I would have been a horrible test patient.
April 12th, 2006 19:01
I was also tested for sleep apnea in pretty much the same manner except they didn’t let me stay and take naps throughout the day.
Suddenly I feel very cheated.
April 12th, 2006 19:14
wow, I always wondered about this! Hope you get it all figured out, Jon
April 13th, 2006 01:30
Cool! So what brought this on, have you had a lot of trouble sleeping? I think I wouldn’t have been able to sleep at all if I was all wired up like that.
April 13th, 2006 06:56
hmmm…well this is an interesting post. i have anxiety about people watching me sleep (or getting anesthesia and being all groggy before and after falling asleep). this sounds dreadful to me! but interesting. and you do what you have to do, right?
i hope the findings lead to good results for you.
April 13th, 2006 06:56
and i can’t believe you could nap on demand. wow.
April 13th, 2006 07:25
as an insomniac I hate you for your ability to nap on demand.
It’s unfair.
Also…there IS NO Way I would be able to sleep. Chris would have to be beside me. I would need my own pillow (I travel with it) and some sort of narcotic.
April 13th, 2006 08:07
Jon, I read this so carefully, because I’m booked at a sleep clinic in May for insomnia. I can’t sleep in my bed … how will I ever sleep with all of this stuff??
Hope you get some answers!
April 13th, 2006 08:51
I am so jealous that you got to take FOUR naps. I can only sleep when I am sitting up trying to meditate. In a dark room, in bed? forget it. And it sounds like you slept better there than at home? Mild sleep apnea? that doesn’t sound like waking up hundreds of times during the night! I suggest a do-over.
April 13th, 2006 09:00
3 days left John!
April 13th, 2006 09:36
this has me thinking of those cracker factory movies. sounds like you had an interesting night.
April 13th, 2006 10:14
I had a test done years ago, but I didn’t get to take naps or stay through the day…I should get tested again.
April 13th, 2006 11:59
Wow - a totally justified day of watching TV, reading and napping without an illness. Sounds kind of cool.
April 13th, 2006 13:02
Wow - I know it must have been really weird going through this - but I hung on every word thinking - “My husband has gotta do this!”
I hope you find what you are looking for and get some good sleep!
April 13th, 2006 15:13
Haha…when I read to the part where they want you to put on your sleep wear..i was thinking “yeah i sleep naked”..hahaha :)…..yeah for them is not funny..but i am still laughing :D.
April 14th, 2006 11:36
nice holiday, :)
April 14th, 2006 18:58
You have a brain and a heart…wow, simply amazing. I’d have never guess…lol.
April 14th, 2006 21:33
That’s so interesting! I think I’d have a terrible time going to sleep there with all that stuff on me. They’d hate me - I get up at LEAST once and usually twice each night to go to the bathroom. Gotta love water!
April 16th, 2006 22:45
great description. i actually worked in a sleep lap in the summer after first year. (search for me on pubmed and some sleep paper will come up!) in any case, i was subjected to these tests as well. i actually have a picture of what i looked like somewhere, but it was a polaroid, and i have no idea where to find it.
my morning tests were divided into sleep latency tests (where they measured how long it took to fall asleep), and maintenance of wakefulness tests (where they measured how long i could stay awake in a semi-dark room with little stimulation). The latter tests (MWT) were extremely tortuous! i celarly remember dreading trying to stay awake. in those tests they’d wake you as soon as they sleep on the tracing. you’d never think that you fell asleep, but there it was on the tracing. (i think it was like catching you a second before you do that “head jerk” thing when you’re trying to stay awake - and failing!)